To the Protege: The Mentoring Edge
No one needs to have a mentor.
However, most of the great masters seem to have had one.
Hmmmmm…feel free to by-pass this blog post if you have no interest in mastering something in your soul, your vocation, or your world. You should be fine on your own.
But, if you sense there may be more in life for you, from you, read on.
In his book, Mastery, Robert Greene expands on just that discovery—those who have made mastery their aim had mentors. In a review of the biographies of great masters of their trade—people like Leonardo Di Vinci, Wolfgang Mozart, Ben Franklin, John Keats, Thomas Edison, the Wright Brothers, Albert Einstein, Martha Graham, Caesar Rodriguez, Yoky Matsuoka, John Coltrane, and others—each had the guiding presence of a mentor. All of these leaders, although we know them for their individual achievements and performances, were followers of others. They knew the benefits of gleaning directly from credible teachers who had time, expertise, and capacity to transfer what they were and what they knew into the lives of protégés. This is not only true for the lives of folks who are notable historically.
This is most likely true in our own lives, and in the lives of our contemporaries. Think of well-renowned leaders, performers, and artists and see if the pattern still rings true. The pattern is certainly true in my life. When I think of how I have shaped my classroom experiences to be unconventionally theatrical throughout my teaching career, I have to thank Dr. Darlene G., a drama professor in my Ph.D. program. When I think of my deepest insights regarding culture, society, and international relationships, I have to thank Joe S., an anthropologist in my undergraduate program who translated years of missionary service into simple-to-understand concepts and practices that would hopefully erase for some, the painful effects of "the ugly American." When I think of how I shape my consulting engagements for clients to be provocative, life deepening, and profitable along multiple bottom lines, I have to thank Bobb B. and his modeling of the consulting process. When I think of how to be a joyfully attentive father, I have to thank Billy and Lynn D., parents of four daughters who made time for me when I was a young, single man trying to find my way through the twists and turns of wholesome relationships. These mentors, and there are many more that I could refer to, shaped me. From their lessons, I pay it forward, and contribute to the shaping of others.
Was mentoring a need in my life? No, not like water, and oxygen, and food are needs. Few things are as unappealing and commonplace as an author insisting that whatever they happen to be speaking or preaching about is the ultimate necessity for the hearer’s life. However, if mastery is an aim in some aspect of your life, it is possible mentoring may satisfy a need. At least, it is an opportunity to gain an advantage.
Mentoring gives the one being mentored an edge.
In this blog-based conversation you find yourself reading, it is my hope that more and more mentors would join the fray. Of course, the concept of mentoring is shrouded in mist and mystique. I hope this conversation will blow away some of the needless fog around this ancient art of people-building, and result in an increasing number of thoughtful leaders who adopt a lifestyle of relational investment in others.
Consider becoming a mentor if…
…there is an area of practice or thought, in which you know you could—or perhaps others know you could—be increasingly able to make a contribution in the lives of others through your competencies.
…you have at least a few people around you who would benefit from learning from you around your areas of increasing competency.
…you have come to the spiritual conclusion that enriching the lives of others through the gifts of time, attention, and training will enrich your life.
Okay, hopefully you can see the bar is not too high. I did not ask whether your hair was silver, whether you have 100 awards on your shelf for leadership in your industry, or if you have royal blood and rank that legitimizes your contribution. Rather, the best mentors are those who are aware they have gifts to give, and they are prepared to situate their lives to give those gifts to those who would appreciate them…the protégés.
Many people discount their contribution as potential mentors, because they themselves have never been mentored by anyone. Not sure what to do, they lack confidence. This is a natural, even attractively humble, attitude. (Let the prospective protégé beware of the one who comes across someone who flaunts themselves off as a mentor, but they are merely arrogant and seeking an audience for their own egos!)
